Now that we have settled into our new building, it seems everyone is getting a little more comfortable with the new routines in our new spaces. However, I did want to address toys at RidgeKidz. Over the past 2-3 weeks, I’ve gotten a handful of questions from several volunteers connected to toys. I’ve also observed a few activities that I wanted to address. I know this is all new, and I’ve talked about this in some environments, but probably not in every environment. So, I figured it would be good to clarify toys and small group activities here where everyone could read it.

I have a very strong philosophical position on toys in kids’ ministry (and small group activities), and some of that is being expressed in our new facility. If you haven’t heard my position, you might wonder why we’re doing what we’re doing. You may also wonder why some age groups have some toys/games, and others do not. Okay, let me explain.

The “average” church and children’s ministry is loaded with toys, especially in the younger areas. In these environments, a reasonable period is dedicated to free play. Many of these same churches might utilize the playground as well. Many churches use toys and playtime to supplement their time because their curriculum and content won’t fill an entire hour (or perhaps the content doesn’t engage every kid as well as it should). This hits on one of my first convictions. For most kids, we only have an hour with them. Some kids only come 1-2 times a month. Because we have such limited time, I’m very reluctant to supplement very much time for free time. I want our consistent and weekly volunteers to get as much time with their kids as possible. So, my philosophy says that we provide a limited number of toys (in a more “activity centers” approach) for our younger kids, typically during drop-off and pick-up. During most of the service, our kids engage with their leaders through fun, age-appropriate, and play-based activities. This is FAR BETTER than free play. Kids have access to toys all day – I want their time at church to be more intentional and relational. This is why you see fewer toys and less time dedicated to play in our preschool environments.

So what about toys in elementary areas? Why don’t we have any in most of our elementary environments?

This is a great question that ties in with my earlier philosophy and age-level development. Younger kids (in the preschool age) developmentally tend to play with toys individually. Cooperative play is something that develops as they get older. If we have some lag time (during check-in and check-out), it’s way better to provide toys because preschool-age kids generally are not going to engage cooperatively on their own. For these kinds of moments, toys are age-appropriate.

However, once we get to the elementary-age environments, most (if not all) the toys are gone. Elementary-aged kids are more capable of cooperative play and activities (although this will always be a tad more difficult in the kindergarten-age groups because they’re really in that transition time). For elementary, we provide interactive pre-service activities to engage kids before the service begins. This is also the time to engage them more relationally—asking questions, telling stories, and playing simple group-based games in the circle. There is an art to this – and it might involve having some supplemental activities (which we can provide for you) like card games (uno, go fish, old maid) or some other activities that keep everyone engaged without losing control. The solution is not just to bring in toys but it’s to connect/engage with these kids relationally. It involves being highly engaged and leading the kids in activities.

This is true of all elementary ages, and the older the kids get, the easier this is to do. As kids develop, they become more relational and enjoy conversations as much as games and activities. The answer to the question is always the small group leader. I know we probably haven’t equipped you with all the right activities, but we can and will – let us know what you might need that you don’t have – and we’ll get you equipped.

Okay, I’m ready for the big question. I already know what you’re going to ask. What about those preteens? They’ve got a craft table, a basketball game, and other activities. What gives? Why do they get those things and the younger kids don’t?

That’s a great question. It seems like we’re saying one thing and doing something different – and we are… sort of.

Here’s my last philosophical point. I’m ALWAYS going to pull out all the stops for preteen kids. ALWAYS! When a kid hits 10 (plus or minus a year), they’re immediately ready to be a teenager. They want to gravitate to everything teens do and push away from everything kids do. At this age, many kids tell their parents that church is boring and that they don’t want to come anymore. Many parents are afraid that making their kids go to church will cause them to hate God or hate the church. I don’t think it does, but when an 11-year-old is screaming at you that they hate church, that’s a tough place to be. Because of this, we will do everything we can to make preteens LOVE being at church. So that means that we do some things for them that other kids don’t get to do. It’s such a critical age. Helping preteens stay connected to the church and their small group leaders is essential to successfully transitioning them to student ministry once they hit 6th grade.

This is normal, developmental stuff. Older kids get to stay up later. Older kids get special privileges. Older kids have certain perks. It’s fun to look forward to – and it’s fun to get to this age group finally. We want every preteen kid to be so excited about finally being in our preteen environments that they’ll never (or almost never) scream at their parents about attending church.

Hopefully, this helps explain why we have toys in some places and not toys in others and why we spend so much less time with toys and free play. Don’t hesitate to reach out if you have additional questions, concerns, or even some ideas/resources. Not having toys is hard at first, but once we get the hang of it, the kids won’t even give it a second thought.